Sunday, November 11, 2007

Be Still

No, the baby still is not here. After trying basically every natural means of labor induction possible and being seriously tempted to reach into the little black box in the back of my truck, God spoke. I'm not one to say "God told me this or that," but this was one of those still, small voices that whispered at 4 a.m.
"Be still and know that I am God."
Yes, it was 4 a.m. and I was awake because the night before I'd actually had pretty regular contractions that then just went away (second time this has happened). My back was killing me, and I was thinking to myself "what else can I do to make this happen." I was worrying because Steve is scheduled to go on a 4 day hunt to Illinois this week Thursday and I don't want to ruin this plan he's had for over a year, but I also don't want to do labor or new baby by myself. What could I do?
"Be still and know that I am God."
Unmistakable. This is not the kind of message that sits kindly on my ears for two reasons. First, being still. I had just walked a mile on the treadmill at 11:00pm trying to keep things moving. The day before I'd worked for an hour in the garden. I've been baking up a storm. Being still is not on the recipe for getting this baby out. Second problem is knowing that I'm not God. I can't think of too many days in my life where I haven't known who the God of the Universe is, but still try to be the god of my own life. Control, control, control, even in chaos I'm in control.
I think I have a couple hard lessons to learn, and I'm sure they won't be learned in a day. But the peace that I have now is amazing and all-encompassing. God is in control and I just need to sit back and watch the show.
"Come and see the works of the Lord, the desolations he brought on the earth. He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear, he burns the shields with fire. Be stiil and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress." Psalms 46:8-11

3 comments:

Trina said...

Wow, Rachelle! Sounds like you ARE in control - of your attitude! I could have used this kind of encouragement in the week I was overdue with Jesse. In the end he came just in time! I'll keep praying for patience for you and for all to fall into place.
I'm so glad you have a blog! Makes the miles seem fewer...

KDoug said...

Still no baby!!!! How far overdue are you? Geez. Your little boy is going to by shy. HA! That's a joke. No way will that happen. Can't wait to see who he looks like since you currently have one of each.

Good luck!

JLenarz said...

Man, Rachelle! This post was so encouraging. Thank you so much for that! I had tears in my eyes as I read it, thinking of the times that I need to be still and know. Thanks!